Rewards of Renewal
Considerations for remaining present to experiential learning
Zachary Green
The gift of deeply personal experiential learning is that it leaves little doubt that we have we have been moved. The tears, the pounding of the heart, the depletion, the elation, the witness, the emptiness, and the churning of insights are only a few of the characteristics of what comes from being fully present to the healing inner work needed to practice more effective leadership.
What follows are a few of the many considerations that are important to keep in mind to have the rewards of renewal remain more lasting and the insights retained longer when engaged in experiential learning . While each of us will differ in terms of which of these considerations is most important to deepen our experience and make it applicable to our lives outside of the forum, what is essential is that action is taken early on after the event to assure optimal integration of the learning.
WRITE IT DOWN — Put you learned to work immediately!
While the emotional tone and intensity of experiential learning is retained long after the event, specific insights often rapidly slip away. The reason for this kind of amnesia is that most of us enjoy coming in touch with such deep learning, but we also have grown accustomed to familiar patterns of coping with our lives. The effort to integrate these new insights is disruptive. How we see ourselves in the world and how others see us are subject to change. We unconsciously fear there may shifts, subtle and dramatic, in the realms of the personal, the professional, and the possible.
…and we are correct!
When we write down our learning and insight from a forum, we are making an implicit contract with ourselves. By committing pen to paper, we are becoming the authors of a different reality. In other words, we are exercising the personal authority to shift our internal narrative and external practices to engage new personal and professional possibilities. When “it is written” we are taking the first step to make it so.
While one may think, “I will never read it again anyway,” such cynicism is a defense against holding ourselves accountable for what we now know. It is also a way to diminish the impact that integrating the insight will have on who we may yet become. In reality, writing it down is like a seed that will germinate in us in the proper fertile circumstances — one day, one year, or one decade from now. Our words, once read by our future self, will offer encouragement and support for us to live more fully into we already are and the purpose for which we were born.
STAY CONNECTED — Make a commitment to contact the people that have your back.
The power of experiential learning is that it is conducted in the presence of others. The shared vulnerability and intimacy of the experience heightens awareness, providing unique perspective for all involved. While our personal reflections are very important, the mirror held up to us by others who were also in the experience deepens the learning.
Whenever two or more are gathered to sustain this connection, there is inspiration in the midst of the union. The nuances of what we heard, the different facets of what we say, and echoes of what we felt are activated anew, giving us a different sense of our insights. Most important of all, the cultivation of these relationships creates bonds that grow in strength with each interaction, often lasting a lifetime.
Those who are most courageous will also stay connected with those with whom there is some ambivalence and struggle. In many traditions, such people are considered to be our teachers. What we find difficult, disdainful, and disturbing in others can often only be recognized because it is a (disowned and denied) part of ourselves.
What is most important to know is that the effort to stay connected can range from developing lasting friendships to acknowledging our colleague with the occasional “like” of a social media posting. Key to what it means to stay connected is the intentionality and mutuality of the practice.
FIND FIVE MINUTES — Take a moment daily for reflection, prayer, or mediation.
Given how rapidly “life takes over,” especially for those who seek to serve others, it becomes seemingly impossible to take five minutes for oneself. There is the email that has not been written, the phone call that should have been made, the family member that needs attention, the deadline that is rapidly approaching, and the community member that needs your help — all the time. When then look up, it is time to lay down and attempt to get enough rest to do it all over again the next day.
There is mounting evidence that those people who take time in the day — or at least their week — to mediate, pray, reflect, go for a walk, do yoga, dance, draw, or otherwise reconnect with their inner self are actually more efficient, effective, and creative than those who do not. While some will argue that “there is not enough time” or “it is just a way to escape” are excusing and colluding with their addiction to the affliction of busy-ness. Those of us prone to this addiction will also surround ourselves with those similarly afflicted to gain social reinforcement that enables us to stay off our knees or our cushion or in nature, as the case may be.
When find that first five minutes, we will soon discover that it is hardly sufficient for what our soul needs to place our insights into practice and keep the nurturing relationships in our lives support our emerging higher self. While alone, such practice may not be sufficient, it does provide a cornerstone that supports personal insight and collective action.
PREPARE NOW — Make each day an for the inner work of leadership.
Paraphrasing a common aphorism from the arts, the leader who fails to prepare prepares to fail. Given that the experiential learning will continue for a number of sessions through a variety of events, the notion of preparation can seem daunting. Yet, preparation is not of the typical form where one diligently and vigilantly completes assignments to gain approval from some formal authority. Quite the opposite is true. There is no grade to be given or received. This kind of preparation involves the inner work need to bring to presence the authentic and emerging self.
While we can make claims of self-awareness and say “I know myself well,” such pronouncements are far too often the clearest evidence that there is a gap in our preparation. Take as one example the exercise where one is asked the seemingly simple question of “what is your purpose?” That we have as many different answers as the number of times the question is posed means we have different faces within ourselves — different voices within our own being that are all vying to be known and make influence how we make our mark in the world.
When we prepare now, it does indeed mean that we do those technical things, like knowing schedules, reading papers, and completing required documents. Yet, when we mistake these technical elements for the adaptive challenge of dealing with who we are becoming and how that influences how we impact our communities, we have missed the mark. Preparation is being true to who we are, discovering what truly “is” in our context, and facing what we must in order to offer the leadership that is most needed if the change is going to come.
TAKE (SELF) CARE SERIOUSLY — Make sure that these practices are embodied.
As with finding the time to take five minutes, equally important is the serious practice of self-care. There are the reflective practices that accompany those moments that become devoted to prayer and meditation. There are also the embodied practices that are related to health and healing. What we take into our bodies and how we take care of our bodies have a great deal to do with how we are able to make our leadership manifest in the world.
It is easy to reduce this practice into vanity about looks. Indeed one of the dangers of self-care is how ego lurks nearby and can lead one to mistake how one looks for with a healthy outlook on life. What is being suggested here is that the strength of experiential learning often relies on how well the vessel — our body being — is ready to carry the load that comes from new insights, more intimate relationships, reflective practices, and constant renewal from preparation.
A body that is strong and healthy is more likely to be able to hold and carry these practices to our next stop along the journey. As with any practice, it is often necessary to find the space and place where this embodiment can naturally come into being. Much as a line dance can bring nearly everyone to their feet, so it is that we must learn to stand in ourselves in a way that the music of who we are can most enjoy the dance.
POST SOMETHING — Bring greater consciousness to your virtual presence.
Our world has expanded whereby our potential for connection is through pixels on a screen. How we relate to this world through our virtual selves is increasingly important. Part of what makes experiential learning so powerful is, in part, because it allows us to have direct face-to-face interaction. One way to keep this learning alive is for there to be some digital representation and reminder of what we gained from such events. Much as writing in a journal, a blog or social media posting creates a record of the experience for our virtual consciousness. Moreover, the posting becomes literally a part of network of global connections with potential for exponential global reach.
While posting may seem trivial and passive, the power in it comes through the cumulative impact of similar efforts by friends and colleagues. A small trend or meme can emerge from themes that are drawn from experience, event if limited to those who were in the event together. Perhaps most important, the posting allows for a different quality of expression as well as a different time horizon for response by others. Unlike the connections that call for direct intimacy and a degree of vulnerability, postings are emotionally and temporally one-step-removed, allowing a sense of safety to make what is learned known without dealing (immediately) with the impact that it may be having.
Ideally in the longer run, there is a quality of web presence from all who have shared the experience that creates an energy and ethos of its own. As such the virtual influences the real, creating a cycle of learning that becomes self-perpetuating and has the potential of linking to the larger community.
REPEAT…REPEAT…REPEAT — Work to make your practices habits of the heart.
Each of these practices is best sustained through repetition until they become habit. Further, each of us will be more adept at certain of these considerations and outright resistant to others. What is important is to begin with ones strength and keep the end in mind — living more fully into the reward of renewal that comes through experiential learning.
